Song of the Gate Bum
SONG OF THE GATE BUM
"Ms. 'Morgana' is it? Whatever!
Gate me to Britain and soon.
Of course I cannot be bothered
To learn using that Gate of the Moon."
"Mr. 'Darius' is it? Good evening!
I beg transit wherever I roam.
Some chump like you always gates me:
So I give no thought how to get home."
"Mr. 'Lancelot' is it? Please gate me!
You're not like those last selfish trolls!
True, you just heard me brag of my riches,
But I cannot be troubled with scrolls."
"Mr. 'Death's Head' is it? Nice outfit!
I think I met you at some other banks.
Once again, I need gating to Britain:
Would you be so helpful-? Gee, thanks!
This doesn't remind me of Britain.
It's a part that I've never seen.
The stonewalls and tombstones and coffins:
the people are skinny and mean!
"Mr. 'Lich Lord' is it? How noble!
Would you gate me in any direction?
I'm dead and in need of a healer:
Unless I can bum resurrection."